i should be more like the squirrel

happy birthday, jaimie.
as i sat outside, i noticed the perfect little turtle my four-year old cousin hannah had drawn yesterday on the sidewalk. it made me smile.
"be like the squirrel, girl. be like the squirrel. oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. give it a whirl, girl. be like the squirrel." good advice, white stripes. i should be more like the squirrel.
i have the itch. i need to go to a concert. bad.
i didn't want to get out of bed this morning. i wasn't surprised. this is now a regular occurrence.
i had another God-damn dream. fuck it. no more.
my brain is not a macroeconomics brain.
it's okay if you don't understand. it's okay if you don't have anything to say. i'd rather you didn't get it. i'd rather you didn't say anything at all.
is it too early to go to sleep?
holding hands. talking. laughing. knowing.
i wonder if abby now has an apartment in new york. the city's great, right?
it just makes it worse.
fuck.
i want to write something else. i want to say something else. but i can't. i need to, but i just can't find the words.
i'm twenty-two. that's too young to give up.
i wish i wasn't so overdramatic.
i wish i wasn't so outspoken.
i wish people would stop overestimating me.
lucy gave me kisses over the phone. we are bff's.
maybe i should send my two week friend notices. i am sorry. lindsay will no longer be able to participate in this friendship. she is tired. and frustrated. and psycho. and...and...doesn't deserve it.
please don't comment. not to this post.